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1. |
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("There aren't any lyrics, really. This is a comedic skit intended as a separate intro to the song "Lemmings". Those of you who are too young to get hip to this kind of track, Google "Cheech and Chong" or "National Lampoon Radio Hour". Better yet, ask your grandparents if they have those kinds of records next time you're over at their house. If they smoked pot, or still do, they probably have 'em." -MP)
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2. |
Lemmings
02:46
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The little people need another hunk of meat
Here's the latest pretty boys all young and cute and sweet
They'll get their best hacks to write 'em catchy tunes
If they burn out just get another group of goons
CHORUS: You couldn't like this song and I'm not sorry
You wouldn't buy this song and I won't cry
You don't like anything until you're told to
You'll just be lemmings 'til you die...
They have a stranglehold on all the industry
Commercial radio is their sole property
If it don't catch the fish each time the net is thrown
And line their bank accounts, it's just not good to go
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3. |
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There's more to life than punk rock
You're boring, boring, boring, boring
Take some classes, read a book
You're boring, boring, boring, boring
I don't care what bands you've seen
I don't care about the fuckin' scene
There's more to the world than that
More than acting like a fuckin' brat
There's more to life than punk rock
You're boring, boring, boring, boring
Wear some clean clothes, get a job
You're boring, boring, boring, boring
Just another lame ass fan
Seen the same half dozen bands
Think I'm fucked up? I don't care
You're just a poseur with fucked up hair
You're boring, boring, boring
You're boring, boring, boring
You're boring, boring, boring
There's more to life than punk rock
You're boring, boring, boring, boring
Get the fuck out of my face you shoplifting motherfucker!
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4. |
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Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
Come on in!
I'll show you my etchings
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
Have a Dr. Pepper and rum.
This stuff used to get us drunk when we were younger!
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
That's very interesting....
Tell me more!
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
Are you losing weight?
Well, gee, you look great!
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
Ha ha ha ha ha ha
Gee, you're a funny lady.
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
I took this course
They said, "Let the girls talk. They want to be noticed."
So anyway...
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
I'm in favor of PEACE!!!
What's that you say? "Christians to the lions?"
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
Are you getting drunk?
Well, maybe you want to crash here...
Uh huh, yeah, uh huh I understand
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5. |
Cut Them Loose
02:27
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I’m sick and tired of all these rich folks
Bitching and moaning about their taxes
Like a bunch of fuckin’ babies
Like they’re all gonna starve to death
We will never be served with the truth
Maybe we just need to cut them loose
And what’s up with the fuckin’ government
Sucking on the dicks of the special interests
What the fuck do they think they are
They just care about what side the butter’s on
And what’s up with the TV news
They try to influence how you think
They’re just a bunch of overpaid assholes
Telling you who got killed today
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6. |
Ignoramus Cum Laude
04:03
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You tried to play me for your gain
You must have thought I was insane
Go ahead
Play your juvie games
Use name calling if you choose
But if I am such a loser
Then how come you always lose?
You thought you had me in a trap
You thought you sold me on your crap
I won't buy your pitch
No, I wouldn't play your game
And next time you need to play the victim
Bet you'll drop my name
Because you're IGNORANT
You're ignorant and evil
And that's twice as dangerous
For everyone who'll cross your path
Because you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
And that makes it even worse
You're more likely to destroy
Innocent lives, innocent people
Will get hurt by your flaws
You won't hold yourself accountible
You won't really give a fuck
Because you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
You don't care
You know everything
You demand we should bow to you
But you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
And YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
That's the saddest thing to see
That you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
If someone puts their trust in you
That's just someone to use
When someone shows some love to you
You play them for a fool
If there's any true justice in this world
You will crush yourself to death
With the weight of your sophistry
Because you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
The saddest thing is that
You think you know more than you really know
And you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
And you think you know the score
But you're just like all the rest
Of the greedy social whores
Including those that you detest
I don't care if you went to college
Your refinement is a ruse
Because you're ignorant
Of your own ignorance
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7. |
Hi!
02:04
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Hi
I wrote this song here just for you
Because I had to tell the world
About what a fuckin’ jerk you are.
Who
Would ever want to look at you
Would ever want to listen to you
Would ever want to ever be you.
You think
That we all should follow you
Like you’re some kind of demigod
But God wouldn’t be as lame as you are.
Yeah you
Act like you’ve got some kind of plan
But you’re just a pathetic man
Who doesn’t have a pot to piss in
For brains.
Or even one fuckin’ thing to say
That makes any sense anyway.
Why don’t you kill yourself and spare us?
Yeah you
You play me like I’m a dumb asshole
But at least I’ve got heart and soul
Unlike you, whose life is nothing.
Yeah you
You’re just a waste of your Daddy’s sperm
You’re just a waste of time and space
You make me want to fuckin’ kill you
Yeah you
You’re just a waste of your Daddy’s sperm
You’re just a waste of time and space
You make me want to puke all over you
All over you!
UUHLLLGGGHHHHAAALLLLUUUPPPBLLLLUUURRGGGHH
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8. |
System Of Error
02:53
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Just another face in the crowd, and I'm scheming
What I'm gonna do with my life, 'cause I'm dreaming
Of a violent overthrow of the country
'Cause it doesn't do a damn thing for me.
System of error getting worse every day
And people tell me, "Hey, what can you do?"
But when I'm off of this plane and I get my wings,
Watch out, 'cause I'm coming for you.
In and out of one hole after the other,
Don't know why I'm still here at all.
Ah, but I figure if I postpone the noose or the gun,
I may see some of you villians fall.
A system of error getting worse every day,
And people tell me "Hey, what can you do?"
But when I'm off of this plane and I get my wings,
Watch out, 'cause I'm coming for you.
Running and screaming,
Watch it 'cause I'm coming for you.
System of error...
"...what can you do?"
Voices in your head...
Stuck inside your head.
GIVE UP! GIVE UP! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Running and screaming...
IT'LL BE GREAT!
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9. |
Am I There Yet?
07:10
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She kind of likes her menial job at Denny’s. She puts in her graveyard shift, 8 hours, then back to the residential hotel. A lovely Victorian piece of deterioration with a picturesque view of a swill-soaked alleyway. As she wonders if it’s a good night to score some heroin, she counts her tips and softly makes an appeal to God.
Am I there yet?
Am I there?
Bill ran out of medication this morning. His state medical assistance was cut off last month. He’s starting to hear those voices again, just like when they found him out by the river. Presently, they’re telling him that the CIA knows he’s still got the chip the aliens implanted in his thigh, and the agents have been putting sodium penathol in his tap water. He knows they won’t make him snitch, but then there’s a knock on the door; he thinks it’s a pair of agents come to grill him at last, but actually it’s the landlord and the hotel manager coming to collect the rent. He suddenly runs to his window, leans out and bellows at the top of his lungs.
Am I there yet?
Am I there?
It’s an okay job, as far as jobs paying what he gets paid tend to go. A little puke or piss to clean up once in a while, or a drunk or deadbeat to kick out occasionally, but that’s not too often. He was reading a story in the Weekly World News about how members of the Knights Templar were the ones really in charge of the Trilateralists, the Catholic Church, and the Monkees reunion tour, when the guy in the hooded sweatshirt walked in. There wasn’t even any words, no “stick ‘em up” or anything, the guy just produced a Smith and Wesson .38 and discharged the weapon once in the bartender’s face. At the one crucial last moment frozen in time as the poor kid stared at the seemingly endless tunnel of the handgun’s barrel, the question suddenly and inexplicably entered his head.
Am I there yet?
Am I there?
Giuseppe was hauling ass out of the door of his condominium. Fresh in town from the relocation at the behest of his father, the reputed mob boss Don Jacuzzi, he was the poster boy for the Optimist Society tonight. Hopping like an Olympian over the door of his Ferrari convertible, his mind was clearly fixed upon the evening ahead. It was time to meet for coffee with the freak he’d met through the personals section of the local weekly free newspaper. Nearly maintaining an erection from the anticipation alone, he turned the ignition.
BOOM.
Ciao baby.
Within 2 hours, the FBI, the ATF, the local and the state law enforcement were carefully combing the scene, scooping up
microscopic bits of explosive material and Giuseppe as well.
Don Jacuzzi received the call late that night. He thanked the agent on the phone, hung up and stared at the Long Island Oceanside. Suddenly, he clutched his chest, and the most beautiful cherubic winged figure came forth from a tunnel of light and held his hand, and suddenly everything seemed all right.
Later, at the double funeral of her husband and son, Mrs. Jacuzzi related to friends and relatives that when she entered the room, the Don was just laying there moaning and groaning something that she swore sounded like he was saying…
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10. |
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I wanna be a slut, just like you
'Cause you're my hero, dude
At least I'll never be lonely
Who cares if I catch an STD
Or two or three
I wanna be a slut, just like you
'Cause you're my hero, dude
I envy the life you've led
You get to mess with women's heads
And make them think you bared your soul to them
It's their fault if they didn't know
It was just pretend
Just to git ya some
I wanna be a slut, just like you
'Cause you're my hero, dude
At least I'll never be lonely
Who cares if you spread an STD
Or two or three
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11. |
Look The Other Way
01:37
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Look away
Look away and look the other way
Look the other way look away and walk the other way
And when they come to you someday to take what you've got
I want to hear you whine about how everything came crashing down
And those who you elected could do nothing to control them
Just look the other way...
Look the other way 'cause you know you're really good at it
Look the other way 'cause you've been so well trained by your parents
As more and more people are kicked to the curb every day
More and more people are malnourished every single day
More and more children are dying every single day
So look the other way
So look the other way
So look the other way you don't want to be taken advantage of
Look the other way your friends and family would disapprove
And besides it's too hopeless and you've got your own life to live
You've got your own bills to pay and they're all there
'Cause they're just lazy no good deadbeats anyway
That's what all your trusted sources say
So look the other way
Just look the other way
Look the other way it's much easier that way
Look the other way when you hear their neighbors beat their kids
And you hear them scream bloody murder as they're being tortured
Look the other way
After all it's none of your business
Is it
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12. |
Workingman
02:21
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He's a workingman, an uptight businessman
He's got his medical plan and his 401k
He's got his stock options and his Fannie Mae
And he's gonna have a coronary anyday
And he goes for it
And he never quits
And the boss has a big stick up his ass
And he's got some crucial meetings to go to
And he's constipated almost every day
And he thinks there's too much government
Especially when he's trying to rip people off
Or when he wants to tear up on Mother Earth
Those lawmakers don't know how much that stuff is worth
And he makes bipartisan contributions
So he gets both sides to do him favors
And he lives in a gated community
Where minorities are only seen on TV
And he knows he'll have the boss' job someday
Even though he knows that day is very far away
And the chances of success is very poor
But he keeps trying anyway 'cause he's very well trained
And he wears a suit that he got off the rack
Of the local establishment uniform store
And he sits at his desk waiting for something to do
And he knows he'll have a job 'til he gets downsized
And he's got car payments and he's got bad credit
And his ass is getting big and fatter everyday
And he sold his soul for a salary
When they drop him in the hole he'll finally be free...
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13. |
Chickenfucker Blues
03:12
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You’re a chickenfucker, and you smell just like my dog
Dirty whiskey sucker, just a lump upon a log
Conscience full of sickness and your heart and mind are swill
If your maw won’t fuck you then I’ll bet your sister probably will
First I load my guns with clips in case I need defense
Second comes your visit to my place of residence
Third if you get fowl with me it really makes no difference
If you came to fuck around I guess I’ll have to plow you down
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14. |
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Chief the Wino
Really has his program down.
He gets up in the morning,
And he goes to the charity,
And he gets his free hot meal,
Then he goes back to the neighborhood,
And he hangs out at the liquor store,
Then he goes off and gets all drunk,
Then he passes out in the park,
Or an alley or a doorway.
Then the next day he does it again
And it’s the same thing but everyday it’s the same.
Chief the Wino
Really pisses people off somehow
‘Cause he won’t play by their rules.
He won’t participate in their games
Where the most toys gets respect
And alcoholics belong in bars
Every happy hour after work
With a chance to have some miserable sex
Not necessarily with your spouse.
That’s the rules of society
And the Chief is a criminal
‘Cause he chose the street.
What’s the difference
Between a street bum getting drunk
And getting jerked around for minimum wage
And going out and drinking every day
To drink your paycheck to an early grave?
You have a reputation to retain.
But you’re just a wino
With a roof stuck over your head.
One heart attack or stroke and you’ll be dead
And the Chief will still be here and the same.
You’re just a wino,
An over glorified wino,
A socially acceptable wino.
Who are you to judge your peers on the curb?
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15. |
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Well, well, well, here you go again
Trying to pretend like you're my friend
And kissing my ass just like you want to blow me.
Just as soon as I walk away
You turn to someone else and say
I'm just a fuckin' chump and you don't want to know me.
Being so two-faced
Must be a hard thing to do.
Bet it's a real pain.
Glad I'm not you.
Talk that talk and you talk your shit
And then when somebody calls you on it
You just shut your mouth or else you change your story.
I refuse to play your game
My statements all stay the same
What you see is what you get is what I'll tell you
To your face, motherfucker.
Being so two faced
Must be a hard thing to do.
Bet you don't sleep well.
Glad I'm not you.
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Michael Psycho
"His songs aren't flashy, but the riffs and lyrics are awesome."
- Evan Minsker, Pitchfork
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The pre-Dead Moon group's third LP, reissued by Mississippi Records, is punk canon.
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