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Tune In Tonight

from Folk Allah Ewe by Michael Psycho

/

lyrics

VIOLENCE IS COOL. SEX IS COOL. DRINKING IS COOL. ALCOHOL, HOWEVER, IS NOT A DRUG. HOWEVER, ALL DRUGS ARE EVIL BECAUSE THEY ARE ILLEGAL. BUT ALCOHOL IS COOL BECAUSE IT IS PERFECTLY LEGAL AS LONG AS YOU DON’T GET CAUGHT (please note the careful use of the words “get caught”) OPERATING A MOTOR VEHICLE, WORKING, OR ENTERTAINING PROFESSIONALLY UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF LARGE AMOUNTS OF ALCOHOL. HOWEVER, WE ARE MORE THEN WILLING TO MAKE ALCOHOL RELATIVELY CHEAP AND AVAILABLE TO ANYONE AND EVERYONE OF LEGAL AGE WHO WANTS TO PURCHASE IT. HOWEVER, ALL DRUGS ARE EVIL, YUCKY, A THREAT TO THE STABILITY OF OUR MORAL FIBER, BUT ALCOHOL, THAT’S PERFECTLY TOLERABLE, AND BESIDES, ALCOHOL IS LEGAL, AND IT ISN’T REALLY A DRUG BECAUSE IT’S A GENERALLY ACCEPTED PART OF OUR ESTABLISHMENT CULTURE, JUST LIKE TOBACCO AND VIOLENCE, WHICH IS COOL TO WATCH WHEN IT’S PRETEND VIOLENCE, OH SURE THERE’S A SMALL HANDFUL OF DETRACTORS OUT THERE WHO THINK THAT THERE IS WAY TOO MUCH VIOLENCE IN TELEVISION AND CINEMA NOWADAYS, BUT THEY’RE ALL JUST A BUNCH OF TREE HUGGING PUSSIES WHO TAKE FICTION TOO SERIOUSLY. AND BESIDES, PEOPLE ONLY WANT TO LOOK AT THINGS THAT MAKE THEM WANT TO KILL PEOPLE, GET DRUNK AND GET ERECTIONS, AT LEAST THAT’S WHAT OUR DEMOGRAPHIC STUDIES REVEAL, AND THINGS LIKE AIDS AND UNWANTED PREGNANCIES? THAT ONLY HAPPENS TO FAGS, JUNKIES, SLUTS, AND LIBERAL DEMOCRATS. NOT TO THE AVERAGE TAXPAYING CONSUMER PATRIOTS OUT THERE. THAT’S JUST MORE CHICKEN LITTLE ALARMIST FROM A FRUSTRATED JEALOUS SEGMENT WHO ENVIES OUR ABILITY TO LOOK AND ACT PERFECT WHILE SHOOTING PEOPLE AND HANGING OUT IN BARS, ALL THE WHILE HOLDING GAINFUL EMPLOYMENT AND ENGAGING IN AS MUCH BOUDOIR ACTIVITY AS POSSIBLE, STRICTLY HETEROSEXUAL, OF COURSE. AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE ARE PERFECT, BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE, AND COMPARED TO US, YOU ARE A FLAWED AND HOPELESSLY IMPERFECT FAILURE, SO JUST WATCH OUR MINDLESS GARBAGE WRAPPED UP IN A PRETTY PACKAGE NIGHT AFTER NIGHT, GET DRUNK ENGAGE IN YOUR MISERABLE UNSATISFYING SEX ACTS, GO TO SLEEP, WAKE UP AND GO OUT AND EARN SOME MORE MEAGER WAGES SO THAT WE CAN KEEP FIGURING OUT HOW TO WRANGLE THEM FROM YOU BY SELLING YOU OUR GENERALLY OVERPRICED AND USELESS BRAND NAME PRODUCTS SO’S WE CAN GET RICH AND BUY UP EVEN MORE LAND AND ASSETS THAN WE ALREADY HAVE THANKS TO THE EXCRUCIATING EFFORT YOU AND MILLIONS OF PEONS LIKE YOU HAVE UNDERGONE TO MAKE US, THE SELECT FEW, FAT AND WEALTHY AND SECURE WHILE YOU GO TO BED SCARED SHITLESS ABOUT YOUR FUTURE.

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from Folk Allah Ewe, released November 5, 1996
Lyrics/Music: M. Psycho © 1996 Black Hole Media Co. All Rights Reserved.

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Michael Psycho

"His songs aren't flashy, but the riffs and lyrics are awesome."

- Evan Minsker, Pitchfork

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